December 30, 2009

Full Of Possibility...

Well, it's almost that time.  Time to close out this year and welcome a new one.

The time of year when some folks reflect back on the previous three-hundred-sixty-five days with pleasure,  some with disappointment and then there are some who don't give it much thought at all.

Some set resolutions.

Resolution...to resolve.

Do you set resolutions?

I can honestly say I don't recall ever setting one.

Probably because I know me and I know that I am more likely than not to break it.

What is it about a new year that causes one to make resolutions?

Better yet, what is it about a new year that causes some to acutely analyze the previous 365 days?

We sure don't put that much stock in a week or a month.

So why do we put so much focus on a year?  

I don't have the answer but for whatever reason the summation of 365 days gets a lot of attention from some people.

I once had a dear friend who told me each year on December 31st that the new year had to be better than the last because the last was the worst year of her life.  I never understood her fascination with those cumulative days - the year.  Each new year was a daunting thing to her - so daunting that one January day she took her own life.  

A few days from now will mark the 20th anniversary of her passing.  There were no words then and are no words now to describe the devastation brought on by her actions.

She had an illness...

and as her illness progressed she became unable to see past each day...

and although there had been many happy days in her past she could no longer see them in the rear view mirror...

she saw no joy in yesterday and no hope in tomorrow...

and no matter how hard we tried, we couldn't help her to see.

I don't know for sure but I'd say there aren't many days that slip by me that I don't think of her.  And it might sound odd but when I do think of her it is no longer with sadness for my rear view mirror does work and I can clearly see our happy days.  I also clearly see tomorrow and know that there is a great big world out there just waiting for me. 

Yes, a new year is on the horizon...

there will be no resolutions from me...

there will also be no looking back regretting what might have been...

Her memory reminds me to live my life one day at a time...

I will say my prayers and try to make each day the best it can be...

and if its not...

there will be tomorrow...

clear and full of possibility.

5 comments:

audreybella said...

I don't make resolutions either. If I did I would only have one...To stay in touch with you. You are a special person in my life and I love and miss you dearly.

Have a Happy and Joyous New Year!
<3 Audrey

bj said...

What a beautiful and moving post, Kimbo...I have tears in my eyes and a big ole lump in my throat.
Thanks for sharing your heart this morning.

I hope your New Year is so full of blessings, they just spill out, all over the place.
Wish you could come to my get-together tonight...lots of good foods (well, I HOPE they are good..using some of Pioneer Woman's recipes and, if I do it right, they are always good!!)

HAPPY NEW YEAR.

Grandma Yellow Hair said...

Bravo good for you! Great post and thanks for sharing it with us.
Life is full of possiblities for all of us.
Happy New Year
Maggie

Christy said...

a wonderful perspective...i am glad i stopped over...

Angela Cooper said...

Stopping in from SITS to say "Happy Saturday Sharefest". Have a great New Year.